Undone

Once again, I am undone by Him.


This morning I was feeling “resistant” in my relationship with God, and I acknowledged that in my devotional time. This had been something that was an ongoing thing, and there was a “spiritual dryness” that I’ve known well in the past and was facing once again.

I knew that part of it had to do with an area of my spiritual disciplines where I needed to walk the walk, and not just talk the talk.

So this afternoon I took a very small action step, and did the first of what will become more, and bigger, action steps in the future. There was a relief in my spirit as a certain heaviness lifted, and I knew I was on the right track.

So as I am driving home, I heard a [new-to-me] song by Paul Simon called “Father and Daughter”.  I've posted a link for those like me who've never heard it before. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aqR24ODVlcE

Here's the chorus: 
I'm gonna watch you shine
Gonna watch you grow
Gonna paint a sign
So you'll always know
As long as one and one is two
There could never be a father
That loved his daughter more than I love you

It made me think about my four girls and both of their father’s love for them.

Then my Father interrupted my thoughts and said, “This is about how I feel about you, Anna, and it has nothing to do with what you do, or don’t do. My love for you is not dependent on your actions. You already know this.”

The dam broke and the tears spilled out in amazement, once again, at how much I am loved. I realized in that moment is that I still have mixed up theology about God’s unconditional love for me.

Silly me.